I received an email from a friend today that commented on yesterday’s post. She was so sweet and heart-felt in her concern for my current “situation”. She ended her email by stating that she would keep my family and me in her prayers. My first thought was, “Oh that is so nice. We can always use prayers.” My second thought was, “What in the world did I write that makes her think we need the prayers?!” So, I went back and read yesterday’s post and several other posts, and boy did my eyes widen. I cannot believe what a “doom and gloom” kind of person I am. The overall theme of every post appears to carry a “the sky is falling” tone! Had I not looked back with an objective eye, I w0uld never peg myself as such a pessimist!
So I feel it’s important that I start following up with certain topics to make sure that my friends and family are not concerned that my marriage is over, I’m ready to jump off a cliff, and to reassure everyone that my children really are safe, happy, and healthy! I truly love my life (on most days) and feel that I am the most blessed woman on this earth (every day). I have an amazing husband whom I love to the depths of my soul. My children are my greatest gift from God and my most prized achievement. I just tend to write about the less that terrific feelings I have as a way of coping. I just want to know if any other women out there grapples with the same issues. That being said, I do not want this blog to become some depressing drivel that makes everyone suicidal after reading it!
Therefore, after reading yesterday’s post, I feel I was too harsh on the reality of our situation. In haste, I stated that the children have not “taken” to my husband. What I should have written was that my husband feels the kids have not taken to him. It is his perception and my fear, but not necessarily the truth.
After the kids came home from school yesterday, I sat them down to have a candid discussion regarding exactly how they feel about their step-dad. I asked them a few direct questions, and they answered without reservation and as children always do, with purity in their hearts.
My questions were “Do you love Corey and do you feel your life is better with him a part of it?” Perhaps too deep for them to truly grasp, but they got the jest of what I was trying to get at. To summarize their responses: ”What do you think, mom? Of course, we love him. He is part of our family.” Simply stated and well put! I would be remiss if I did not add that the 6 year old stated, “He is a great ‘fixer’ of our stuff”. Thank you Avery!
Crisis averted. Peace and harmony restored. Now, what’s for dinner?
After the kids were all tucked in for the night, I had a chance to sit down and talk with Corey (my husband) about my chit-chat with the kids. I told him what they had to say. All I can tell you is that with tears in his eyes, a weight was lifted off his shoulders right then and there…as was the same weight lifted from mine. I realized that while life may not be grand and perfect in a blended family, sometimes we as adults over think and psychoanalyze too much. It is my humble theory that we do this out of guilt and fear rather than from a place of rational, objective observation.
Lesson learned: while the sky may be falling in my mind some days, it is not necessarily falling for the rest of the world.
P.S. to my kind and wonderful friend, keep the prayers coming…they certainly can’t hurt!
