My oldest son, Bailey, attended his first girl-boy party this afternoon.  He is 11 years old and proudly, just graduated from the 5th grade today!  A female classmate of his decided to throw an end of the year party and invite both the girls and guys.  My first reaction when he asked if he could go was, “NO!”….Plain and simple.  

Now, I did not say that aloud.  I told him I would have to think about it and get the details from the girl’s mom, but I was just saying that as a courtesy to him.  I had already made up my mind that he wasn’t going.  I was not about to turn over my baby boy to these vulture girls who just look at him like a piece of meat!  

Ok, maybe it’s not quite that bad, but seriously…I was feeling that he is too young to encourage the small exchanges that start to happen at his age between the sexes.  I know it’s a part of the reality of him getting older, but I certainly wasn’t going to be antagonizing the inevitable by allowing him to attend this mixed gala.  I felt like it was a threshold we had not crossed yet, and I really wasn’t equipped to go there with him already.  I mean, I am still grappling with my daughter’s maturing body and hormones flying everywhere, I certainly do not feel emotionally prepared to start dealing with my son’s pre-pubescent issues too!

Well, after giving it more than a moment’s thought, I realized that perhaps my initial reaction was a bit over the top and dramatic.  Honestly, I’m certain I have more to worry about when it comes to the boy-girl party scene when my son is a couple years older than I do right now.  I decided that if I let him go, we are opening Pandora’s Box….and I am going to need to choose my battles very carefully in the preceding years, so perhaps this was not a battle worth fighting for at this time.  

After conferring with a few friends who also have sons that were invited, we were all hesitant, but decided to let our boys go.  No…I don’t always turn to my friends to make decisions about what my son can and cannot do, but I do feel there is power in numbers….and if he was going to be there with his buddies, perhaps the enticement of football would overpower the allure of the girls in bathing suites.  Wishful thinking…I know…but it’s what lets me sleep at night so allow me to go with it.  

The party seemed to go well.  Bailey came home and said he had tons of fun…so no harm, no foul.   I guess what really surprised me the most was how much I feel the same about my daughter’s interaction with the opposite sex as I do with my son’s sudden interaction.  I really thought that I would feel differently about my boys entering this phase in their lives then I do about my daughter.  Much to my surprise, I don’t feel differently at all!  

I want to protect his virtue as much as I want to protect my daughters.  I want to keep him innocent as long as humanly possible; just as I want to with my daughter.  I want to shelter him from the inevitable heartaches and heartbreak that are bound to come his way once mingling with the opposite sex.  I want to spare him the ensuing drama that comes along with allowing girls to enter his “boy’s club”.

 And more than anything, I want to raise an honorable man just as I want to raise an honorable woman….so the bar is raised….and I just pray I am up to the challenge of juggling both the sexes in my care!