I try to be a reasonable woman and let’s face it; sometimes I fail miserably…usually when it comes to things I hold dear such as my children, husband, family or my home.  We are trying to sell our house, and I have a realtor to beat all realtors who just about put me over the edge today.    Granted, I have been incredibly sick all week and spent 3 hours in the emergency room last night just trying to breathe!  Needless to say, on the very few hours of sleep I had last night, coupled with this insane virus that has attacked my body and lungs and left me for dead, today was not the best day to blind side me quite as she did.

I received an email from her suggesting we do all sorts of crazy things to the house such as replace the thousands of dollars we spent on decorative stone with black mulch…throw up black shutters on one of the two windows we have on the front of the house, paint our front door black, and the real dozy…paint the exterior brick a solid dark blue!  Why all the black you may be asking yourself….she says it’s to match the black and grey roof and give the house “cohesiveness”.  Wow…just retyping it makes me feel dizzy and sorry for this woman because I’m afraid she may be color blind and nobody has had the heart to tell her all these years.  Well, today I was more than happy to let her in on the secret!

Honestly, the real kicker for me is that there is literally not a speck of black in our roof…or on the house anywhere for that matter!!  The roof is a darker grey…just a few shades darker than the light grey siding in order to add some depth and contrast to the house.  I’m afraid if we start throwing in all the black she is suggesting, we are going to look like we moved out and the Adam’s family moved in!

She said she really wants the front to “pop” and I guess making my home look like it just received a beat down from the neighbor’s home is her way of doing just that.  Perhaps the new marketing scheme is pity…”oh look honey, that house is all black and blue (with a hint of grey)…it kind of reminds me of that black eye you got last year when you gallantly stood tall against that drunk guy that hit on me at the bar.  I was so proud to pick you up off the floor that night and drag you back to the car.  Let’s buy it!”

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to offend anyone who may have shutters on one front window, a black door, or painted brick as this all needs to be taken into context, but for our home, what she is suggesting just doesn’t work.  And I love black as an accent color, just not for this particular house.  Granted, the yard could really use some sprucing up and a little more curb appeal, which we are happy to tackle, but words fail me when I read what she had in mind.  And how do you say tactfully, “I’m sorry, but we just think that painting everything black and blue is going to make our home look more like an eye sore, than eye catching?!”  Well, as I precluded to earlier in this post, I was not nearly as tactful as perhaps I should have been when I fired back an email suggesting she get her eye’s checked and give me a call once she has glasses! ;0)

Let’s just chalk it up to another rough day to close out what was a very rough week.  Tomorrow is Friday and there’s always hope for a better weekend!